Smart Sammie Savings Club
  Advice for Parents

Most of us want to raise our children in a way that will make them responsible and capable adults. Giving a child everything they want doesn't teach them about real life. Instead, they may grow up with a sense of entitlement believing that someone will take care of them.

The key to solving the problems between you and your wife is communication. But first, you need to think about why you give your kids whatever they want. Is it because it is easier to pull money out of your pocket than to deal with the confrontation that comes when you say no?

• Do you feel guilty for not spending enough time with them so you try to make up for it with "things?"
• Did you grow up in a financially strapped home and you want your children to have better? 
• Do you think you need to say "yes" to everything for your kids to continue loving you?

Once you've examined your own motives, set a time to talk with your spouse about your differing styles when it comes to giving your children money. I suggest that you do this away from your children, especially at first, because it may be a difficult discussion. You need to present a united front and be consistent. If you don't, your children will quickly take advantage of your differences of opinion and manipulate the situation to get what they want. You know how it works, you say NO, and they go to your wife and ask the same question to get the answer that they want...which is YES. Really upsets you, and it’s not necessary. 

If you decide to give your children allowances, agree on an amount and define for what you expect your child to use his or her allowance. What you make your children responsible for really depends on their age, but some examples include personal care items, gas, clothing, entertainment, snacks, CDs, etc. I believe allowances are a good way to teach children to handle money. I also suggest that you don't give advances on allowance except on very special occasions. 

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This will help discourage impulse buying and will teach your children to save up for the things they really want. Open a Smart Sammie savings account for them at South Metro. Make them save a portion of their allowance so they can develop a good habit of saving money at an early age. Get them into a habit of depositing money and only withdrawing money when they specifically need the money to get something they have saved for.

It is easier to develop good habits at an early age than to try to break bad habits at an older age.

Finally, discuss your plan with your children and help them set their own goals. It is very important that your children know the rules what you will give them and what you expect from them in return. It may be difficult, especially if they're used to getting whatever they want and now you've decided to set limits. But, it will be worth a little discomfort to know you are teaching your children the money skills they need to be responsible and financially successful adults. 

Childhood memories are rarely of the "things" our parents gave us. Instead they are of picnics in the park, playing catch in the backyard, flying a kite, playing board games, and riding bikes around town. Create good money memories for them that will last a lifetime. The Smart Sammie Program at your Credit Union can help.

Teach them good financial memories that they can take with them for a lifetime, and money management will be much easier for them and their children.

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